2002 International International Biennial Scientific Meeting

WHO DO I LOVE WHEN I LOVE MY MOTHER? WHO DO I LOVE WHEN I LOVE MY BABY? SEPARATION AND ATTACHMENT THEMES IN PARENT-INFANT GROUPS

Norma Tracey, Vera Auerbach, Mary Cameron, Helen Kvelde, Maria Kourt, Margaret Goodchild, Maggie Newlyn, Sylvia Enfield, Lorraine Rose, and Beulah Warren

nortrac@ozemail.com.au

This paper tries to create an internal paradigm of the meaning of separating for mother and infant. It shows how the issue of previous losses and separations impinges on all aspects of the mother-infant relationship in relation to holding on and letting go. A number of mothers who have attended Mother-Infant Groups have been studied and observed over a period of four years and their own responses to separating have been observed and documented. This paper gives further proof to the links between "good enough" attachment and the capacity of the mother to release her infant. Depression in the mother played a significant role in her capacity to refind her infant and move with the infant in and out of a transitional space. The degree of depression often predicted the degree of non-thinking or cutting off behaviour experienced in separating out. This is a study rather than research, but it highlights important factors that support research on attachment and separation in a most dramatic way.